Why Superwomen Are So Exhausted And Often Don’t Feel Desire or Desired

Jun 05, 2023

 As a recovering superwoman who now works with fellow superwomen every single day, I know a thing or two about feeling exhausted, crusty, and lacking desire.

Women like you are balancing A LOT. You’re doing everything for everyone, thinking ahead, planning, delegating, and being the glue that holds everything together. As a result, superwomen like you often find themselves exhausted, disconnected, and lacking fulfillment.

Despite your outward success, there are three fundamental things superwomen tend to suppress which will ultimately cause you to feel more exhausted, disconnected, and turned off.


1. Dark Desires

One of the primary factors that drain superwomen of their vitality is the suppression of their dark desires. These are desires you’re holding deep within, but are often kept secret due to societal conditioning and fear of judgment.

However, denying these desires leads to a substantial loss of personal power. At the in-person retreat for the women in The Feminine Mentorship, we spent time focusing on dark desires, offering a safe space for exploration and self-discovery.

It was amazing to hear their feedback, expressing how our work together on this topic surpassed even years of therapy and personal development work. For example, one woman expressed a secret longing for respite, admitting, "If only I could have a small accident and go to the hospital to rest".

By acknowledging and embracing our dark desires, we open ourselves up to a profound transformation and genuine empowerment.


2. Energy Leaks

Despite engaging in self-care practices, hiring assistance, and establishing boundaries, many superwomen still find themselves lacking the happiness, energy, and turn-on they desire.

The key lies in identifying and addressing the energy leaks within your life.


3. Pussy Truth

Our pussy truth is an innate wisdom that often goes unrecognized or disregarded. This is referring to what we know in our core and our souls to be truth. Embracing our pussy truth involves reconnecting with our authentic selves and listening to the inner voice that knows what truly resonates with our being. 


Why Do Superwomen Suppress Their Desires?

As women we have been taught to suppress our desires, pleasure, and ultimately our power for our entire lives.

We’ve been taught to give to others before ourselves, to suppress our true needs, to have a “do it yourself” and “don't ask for help” attitude. We’ve been taught that our feelings are too much, we’re too emotional or too needy.

This sets us up to be caretakers and not have our needs met in adult relationships. And the f*cked up part about all of that is we blame ourselves.


How To Stop Suppressing Your Desires So You Can Feel Alive Again

When you get a room of women together in person magic happens. Years of this bullsh*t of good girl conditioning, people-pleasing, and minimizing our needs starts to dissolve in days.

When we are in a room together our desires, truth, and power is restored. In those moments it’s easy to hold it. But it’s so easy to lose it when we are back to real life. When we’re back to the daily tasks and back where there are people to support, it’s easy to lose focus on ourselves and what we desire

I wanted to give you some insight into this because it was so powerful for our women at The Feminine Mentorship retreat. You don't need another coach, you need to do this work! 

At the retreat we examined our dark desires, how we’re used to surviving on crumbs, how we are settling for less than we desire in one or more areas of our lives. Whether you’re with a group of women or not, it’s time to start telling the truth about your dark desires. A truth so clear you can feel it in your pussy.

So, what can superwomen do to stop suppressing their dark desires, energy leaks, and pussy truth?

The next steps are about remembering and feeling. This work involves dissolving the layers of superwoman conditioning – over-functioning, under-receiving, shame, self-abandonment, hustle, lack that we were taught to carry as a badge of honour and responsibility.

We were taught we had to give up ourselves to be a good mother, daughter, friend, earner, etc. We were taught we had to earn our rest, love, and the right to feel pleasure. We were taught to fear our desire. But fearing our desire will lead us down a path of shame and abandonment.

Because of our conditioning we fear that if we follow our desires we will be alone, that there will be a price to pay, or that we will have to give something up. That’s not desire. That’s fear caused by patriarchal lies.

Desire is our pussy truth.

Pussy truth:

  • Is in service of everyone and everything
  • Moves us toward as our true self –  who we were before conditioning got in the way
  • Knows if we desire it, we are worthy of having everything we desire (many superwomen do this in career but not at home or  in relationship)

How do we start living a life more in alignment with our desires? Even the dark desires.

It starts with learning the difference between our pussy truth, dark desires, and fear. We have to be willing to:

  • Tell deeper truths
  • Be present with high sensation in our bodies (pain and pleasure)
  • Feel our feelings
  • Come into alignment with our pleasure and power
  • Stop trying to suppress, avoid, or deny it!

Let’s reclaim ALL our desire as something sacred. Something that brings us closer to who we are - the energized, turned-on version of us. Let’s learn to trust our pussy truth as worthy of attention.


Jordin, I need more help…

There are two ways you can start working with me right now.

Join Pleasure Principles – The program to enhance, reignite, and communicate your desires, while bringing the vitality back to you and your relationships. We meet 1x per month on a video call, you’ll have access to the learning portal with modules to help you create a deep connection with your partner and your own pleasure, and you’ll explore your desires on a deeper level and learn to communicate them in a way that you will be heard and understood.

Apply to work with me 1:1 – Private and exclusive pleasure and intimacy coaching for successful women looking for intimacy, better sex, and more connected relationships. For high-achieving, successful women who have it together on the outside, but feel lonely, lost, and unworthy on the inside. For women who find themselves thinking things like "maybe this is as good as it gets" and "I already have so much, maybe I should just be happy".


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