The superwomen are the over functioners, the caregivers, the over-givers. They typically have a lot of success in their careers, have degrees, get promotions, meet their targets. However, with this success comes a lot of exhaustion, burn out and feelings of resentment.
Superwomen often find it nearly impossible to slow down and rest, and when they finally do, it’s usually because they’ve been taken out by exhaustion or sickness. Once they’ve recovered they jump back into the same over functioning ways. It’s the lifecycle of a superwoman.
Are You a Superwoman?
Take a look at the following questions:
- If you do get the chance to rest, do you feel guilty for it?
- Do you feel exhausted / burnt out?
- Do you push through even though you feel burnt out?
- Would you rather do something yourself then ask for help?
- Are you the one in the relationship who’s in control and has the final say?
- Do you frequently take on the extra work at home or at work?
If you answered yes to most or all of these questions, then welcome to the superwoman club!
The Superwoman Lifecycle
Stage 1: The Good Girl
It’s the conditioning we grew up with as little girls, where we were taught it was always better to be nice and make sure everyone else feels good and comfortable. We learned to not talk back, to get good grades, to do as our mother said, to not be too loud, to toughen up and not show emotion, the list goes on and on. This “Good Girl” conditioning eventually leads to becoming the Superwoman later in life.
Stage 2: Superwoman
The superwoman is the hardened version of the good girl. The good girl has grown up and is now the fixer, the emotional support person for family and friends. The superwoman often ignores her own needs and desires, and sometimes doesn’t even know what it is she desires. She has difficulty communicating her needs and asking for what she wants, going with the notion that she can do it herself.
Superwomen rarely put themselves first, and always hide their emotions to make others feel more comfortable. She feels guilty for saying no or quitting and tends to seek out people who need her, leaving her to over function and eventually burnout.
Stage 3: Chronic Illness
When a superwoman refuses to rest and make time for her needs, she is inevitably physically affected. Our bodies aren’t meant to deal with this much long-term stress, so consistently taking it all on without reprieve can eventually lead to chronic illness. This is such a common concern that chronic illnesses that are on the rise are disproportionately affecting women. Not only should this be an indicator for women to slow down and rest, but also an indicator for others to step up and provide more support.
Besides the evident anhedonia that many superwomen face (lack of joy and pleasure), there are some physical signs to look out for that may be a cause for concern:
Some of these physical symptoms may be a sign that a lot of rest is needed to avoid a chronic illness.
How To Break the Cycle
The superwoman lifecycle is a constant loop, one that many find impossible to break out of. They over-give, over function, and take on so much to the point past burnout and exhaustion. Rather than recognize that they should step back and rest, they are instead forced into rest because of sickness, and as soon as they’re better they jump into their old ways. They don’t learn or understand that it’s a repetitive cycle. In order to properly heal and rest, things have to change. We need to stop over functioning and learn to embrace the feminine energy rather than the masculine energy we’ve been taught.
Be sure to stay tuned for part two in the near future where Dr. Jordin will dive into how to *actually* break the superwomen lifecycle.
The Feminine Mentorship program helps superwomen like you better themselves and their relationships. We teach you how to stop over-giving, how to trust yourself and stop second-guessing, and how to get as much success in the bedroom as you have in the boardroom. The Feminine Mentorship helps to revitalize your relationships or find that relationship you’ve always desired. Find out more here.