3 Reasons You Don't Feel like Having Sex

Oct 11, 2019

Women are led to believe that low libido and having no sex drive is just a part of being a woman.

Men have higher sex drives.

Women stop wanting sex after they have children.

Women’s vagina’s close up and die after menopause.



There are plenty of reasons you or your partner may be experiencing a decline in your desire for sex, but 99% of the time it has nothing to do with your gender, age, or how many kids you have.

The reasons women experience sexual dysfunction more often than men is because of what we have been taught about sex and pleasure.

We have been led to believe that it is normal to never want sex, that it is normal to give up on pleasure after you turn 50, that coming up with excuses to get out of having sex with your husband is a common thing we all do and joke about on sitcoms.

I am here to tell you it is not normal.

And we should not be settling for anything less than great, mind-blowing sex…well into our 50s, 60s, 70s, when the kids are with the babysitter, and even if it is the 6000th time you and your partner have been together.

From my experience in women’s health and treating thousands of women with this very same complaint…these are the 3 most common reasons you don’t feel like having sex:

  1. Stress

Stress and sex do not mix. I can’t be any more clear. If you are stressed, you can’t also be turned on.

If your mind and body are stressed, you are not physiologically capable of producing the hormones and neurotransmitters you need to get in the mood.

Our bodies pick survival (combatting stress) over sex. Every. Single. Time.

The only way you are going to get turned back on is to tackle some of the stress in your day-to-day life.

You owe it to yourself.


  1. Boredom

Our brains like novelty. For the same reasons we like watching new TV shows, getting new notifications on our phones, travelling and buying a new outfit.

It’s the same reason we look back on the first months of our relationships so fondly…because everything was new.

We also like comfort and routine. We like stability and predictability. Which are great for our lives and reducing stress…but not always so great for the bedroom.

When you have been in a long-term relationship or have been having the same sex for years…our brains can get bored.

We need something NEW! 

Recreate those initial days of your relationship with a little novelty. Try a new position, a new location or a new song in the background... 

Give your brain something different to be excited about!


  1. Underlying hormonal imbalance

Hormones control everything. From sleep, to mood, to metabolism to sex and pleasure.

If you have a hormone imbalance, you may be fighting an uphill battle against your body to get yourself in the mood.

A hormone imbalance might present itself with:

  • Hot flashes
  • Vaginal dryness
  • Acne
  • Heavy or painful periods
  • Weight gain
  • Night sweats
  • Inflammation

Book a free Strategy Call to determine what is the best course of treatment for addressing your lack of desire.




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